Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
