I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
