just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
