I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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