something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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