; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
