Walk of Shame. In a state park.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
