I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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