Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
