Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
so much tequila, so little girl.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
