sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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