Having a random hookup so left but love u
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
