Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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