Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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