the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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