I wannas sexs uuuuu
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize