I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
