some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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