Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
