Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
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