Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
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