this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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