its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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