Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
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