That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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