fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
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