"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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