I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
