I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize