Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
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