Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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