Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
