question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
