I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Randomize