Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize