Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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