You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
