; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
