Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
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