i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Will exercising make me less horny?
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