SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
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