Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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