Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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