Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
