I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
