they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Randomize
