I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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