Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
