we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
