He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
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