just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Randomize