absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
You dont lie about slip and slides
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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